Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Bridal Shower Wisdom


Early last month I attended a bridal shower for our elder's second daughter, Blair. It was a joyful time of fellowship. After the last gift was unwrapped and oooed and awed over, a time was opened up for the ladies to share some words of wisdom in regards to marriage. Much of the advice given was truly valuable and I should have taken notes. I don't remember everyone's exact words, but I'll try, nonetheless to share as much as my memory holds.

1. Encourage your husband when he is feeling down or fearful by loving on him.

2. One dear lady whom I admire just said one word, "RESPECT."

3. No matter how busy your day, get the things done that please him, such as having the living room clean (if this is what he wants) so he can have some orderly place to sit and relax when he returns home from work. Prioritize and make important those things which are important to him.


4. Don't over analyze his words towards you. Don't try to think there are hidden motives and thoughts behind his words. You don't want to go there.

5. Be free with your love with no thoughts of restraint.

6. Pray to the Lord to give your husband insight into the areas of vision in which he should be leading. Sometimes upon presentation of certain ideas of vision your husband may not always capture it, but do not be dismayed. Instead of nagging, take it to the Lord in diligent prayer. The Lord will help your husband to understand the vision he needs to have and the vision or idea you presented will become his "own" idea!


7. Be merciful and forgiving with your husband. He is not perfect, just as you are not perfect. If you are generous with mercy, when the time comes when you need to be shown mercy, your husband will be free to be merciful and gracious with you.

I'm sure there was more advice given but this is all I can remember. Since the invitation to the shower asked everyone to come prepared to share some advice or encouragement to the new bride, I was prepared to share a tiny nugget or two, however, I was too shy to do so and thought it best to just gleam the wisdom from the more experienced wives!

I asked my husband beforehand what things I have done throughout our marriage that have been a blessing or encouragement to him. This is what he shared with me and what I had thought of sharing should the sharing have been mandatory and not by volunteering:

1. My husband loves coming home. The warm welcome we give him is the highlight of his day. I have trained the children to view his coming home as the best and most exciting part of our day. When the children see his car coming up the driveway, they all yell, "Dad's home! Dad's home!" We all run to greet him and hug him. I always freshen up and make sure my hair and clothing are in order when I know he will be home shortly. And I always give him a big kiss at the door! "Make your husband's arrival from work the highlight of your day. Greet him as if you hadn't seen him all week." (I'm not sure how this would work out if he works from home!)

2. He appreciates that I have always been kind and loving to his family. "Love his family."

3. He appreciates and is blessed by how I manage his money by being frugal, always striving to buy what we need at the best possible price. "Manage his money well. Be frugal and appreciate how hard he works to provide money for his family."

Anyone care to share a "nugget" or two of their own? I'd love to hear from you! Ask your husband to let you know how you have blessed him. You may be pleasantly surprised at what he mentions. I was so pleased to hear the things my husband mentioned and encouraged to seek out new ways to bless him.

2 comments:

  1. Hola Merisa,

    I read the interview on the Feelin' Feminine website and was so touched by the love between you and your daughter... I found your blog via FF and have been greatly encouraged by the wisdom that you've shared here, thank you! I am the wife of a wonderful man (also Spanish speaking) we have one beautiful daughter and live in NC. In one of your posts you mention being at a theatre here in NC, so I assume you live here as well :-) I am so glad to have found your blog as I have been greatly inspired as a young wife to follow in your footsteps in my high calling.

    Muchas Bendiciones,
    Diana

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  2. In my previous comment I meant to share a "nugget" of marital wisdom, but I forgot to include it before I posted... Actually I have two nuggets :-) My husband loves when I share with him what I am reading about and meditating on from the Bible-- he really enjoys being invited into that part of my life. Another way I've found to honor my husband is to compliment him in more formal settings... he would never ask me to do this (as he is a humble man), but I can always see the smile on his face when I honor and affirm him in front of our friends/guests etc. So much of the time our culture is focused on sarcasm and pointing out each others faults, ... Thankfully the Lord has really shown me how damaging this is to our husbands, and how wonderfully encouraging we can be as wives when we act in the opposite spirit.

    Thanks again Mrs. Merisa for a wonderful post,

    Diana

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